The Curse Of Shapeshifting

So, I saw something fascinating sometime back. It was a red car that kept following another, a dark grey car. As the dark grey car swerves, the red car would also swerve. As the dark grey car takes a U-turn, the red car would do same. For every move, turn, and twist the red car would follow suit.

I’m extremely curious so I kept following. I followed them into a street and I concluded that they were going in the same direction and the dark grey car was the one with the navigation coordinates. It was fascinating to watch. Only that, the red car and the dark grey car didn’t know each other.

The red car was driving to a destination he had never been to and overheard the driver of the dark grey car speaking about heading in the same direction and rather than asking to be sure, he decided to simply follow the dark grey car to wherever it arrives.

How would I know this? The dark grey car had had enough of the red car because he began to think he was being followed for harm. He drove into the street I followed them into because he was trying to be sure that he was being followed. Turns out, he was. Anyone who saw them would believe they knew each other and the follow was intentional. Only that, he didn’t know till things got weird.

We all alighted because the driver of the dark grey car sought to confront the driver of the red car and the conversation that followed confirmed 4 things;
1. The red car was ignorant of his destination and decided to follow the dark grey car because he believed he had heard him confirm that they were heading in the same direction.
2. The owner of the dark grey car was only in a casual conversation with a friend and was only pulling his friend’s legs about meeting at that destination. It was the office of his friend’s ex-girlfriend. Quite poetic, innit?
3. The dark grey car spent so much time on the road and ended at a destination he hadn’t planned to because he was being followed by the red car.
4. The owner of the red car deviated from the path that would take him to his destination because he followed the dark grey car. He would need to spend 2 hours re-routing before commencing his original journey.

Interesting story, right? Well, it’s not exactly a real-life story. It’s one of many blockbusters in my mind. Lol. But, that’s not the point — it’s the focus of this essay so keep it in mind and be free to explore the thought and make whatever you want out of it; especially from the words I have highlighted.

Too many people are like the driver of the red car. Now, don’t be quick to affirm in your mind and attribute that reality to someone you know. Instead, be an investigator of your reality to honestly determine to what degree you are the driver in the red car. At different points in your life, you’d be that driver in the red car but true intelligence would help you realize that soon enough so you can pivot.

Different levers can put us in the driver’s seat of the red car, where we are eroded by the possibility of arriving at the same destination with the dark grey car that we follow without question.

You see, the driver of the red car wouldn’t have thought he was being stupid rather, he would have seen his ability to boycott due course as a testament to his smartness. I mean, he got to keep his ego intact so it doesn’t seem like he didn’t know where he was going in the first place.

Now, that’s a first lesson - this is how some engage. Faking a posture of knowledge, clarity, meaning & purpose so you do not appear to be foolish, unclear & confused. You are so full of yourself and so scared to let your guard down that you fake awareness, intelligence & meaning.

You begin to shape-shift and even when well-meaning people attempt to show you this wrong, you’ve got a complete dictionary of intelligent nonsense to spew as a defense against your misunderstanding of what your destination is.

It was nothing for the guy in the red car to have asked to get clear directions to his destination but rather, he followed a driver who he had thought was going to his destination but wasn’t.

That’s the problem with assumption, we assume that those we admire are on the same journey as us or they are seeking what we seek or heading where we are headed. This is untrue, ridiculously so. Regardless of how aligned you feel with anyone or any venture, your path is so distinct.

Let’s bring this to business and how we engage; it is foolishness to see how a person shows up and simply copy what they do that you love. Why? The front end is only powered by the back end. Whatever you copy would get you to a destination and, you likely would struggle to find your way back because the person you emulate has a defined destination whereas you have an illusion of sameness because of their authenticity.

That is, because they are authentically themselves, it magnetizes you into thinking you are “alike”; headed to the same destination whereas you are not. You are only void of where you should be headed.

The reality of this mutation is in how you would shape-shift more unconsciously than consciously because just like the red car that had to keep swerving, turning, and twisting while following the dark grey car, you would also seek to iterate yourself when your dark grey car (who you admire) launches a new or alternating version of themselves (or entity).

Now, this isn’t conscious and as we delve deeper into this essay, we’ll unpack the conditioning that births this unconscious wiring. So, pay attention.

The chameleon doesn’t consciously change its color according to the environment but because of its genetic makeup would change when it’s in any environment. It becomes more unconscious than it is conscious. This is why I have referred to shape-shifting as a CURSE and this curse is the death of authenticity, meaning & power.

Shape-shifting happens to everyone just that, it becomes culture for one and intelligence for another.

The reality of this culture is an initial fulfillment likened to meaning and purpose when you shape-shift to embrace ideas and ideals that resonate but which later transcend to a merry-go-round where you keep coming back to the point you thought you had left.

No, it’s not a generational curse or a spiritual problem. You’ve only become an excellent shape-shifter and with every season you shape-shift, the self dies till it lacks recognition of meaning & power. Then, it begins to seem like a “power” pulling you back from your lineage. Nope, not necessarily. It’s critical that out of a sense of gross irresponsibility, we do not attribute all of our results to something totally outside of our control or extremely spiritual. You are a God and your creation stands whether it is created consciously or unconsciously. That’s a principle.

There are various reasons we can decide to shape-shift that represent the conditioning for the culture. The first is a given and that’s admiration;

Admiration is necessary. It is powerful yet detrimental. Hence Benjamin Franklin says, “Admiration is the daughter of ignorance”.

You see, admiration becomes poison when you are oblivious of your destination, unsure of it, or disempowered by it, that is, it doesn’t seem good enough. This is because your admiration can become the tool for your iterations. After all, you would often seek to become like what/who you admire because you are unaware, unsure & disempowered by where you should be headed.

It’s just like taking a taxi to a different destination because you love the taxi driver’s rapport with his passengers. Sounds stupid, right? Reality is - that is exactly how a LOT of people live.

You see, admiration can give you an altered sense of perfection where you only trust the judgment of those you admire because you have formed strong opinions about them that demean and belittle your personal power. So, your opinion on an idea can change if theirs superimposes yours without any justifiable reason or claim. You become only sovereign to the degree that their ideas and ideals permit you to operate as sovereign.

And so, because you are so in awe and smitten by your love for them, what they do, or how they show up, you begin to edit yourself to fit into their script so you can embody what they exude. The irony is, that embodiment is a function of essence, not formula. Hence, no matter how you edit yourself to look like those you admire, you will never command the aura that they command that got you to admire them in the first place.

On the flip side, you can admire who you despise. It’s a paradox but as real as night and day. This is because dislike, envy, or anger towards a person is usually a skewed kind of admiration. We just don’t like people who embody what we are not with so much grace, poise, and ease hence, even though you seem to despise them, you take lessons from them unconsciously because you desire to meet up to them.

Have you ever been in a situation where someone who treats you like crap begins to dress, act and even wear the same cologne as you? It’s despise and disdain but borne out of defeat and anger due to how another stands tall and strong in their power.

If you block people and then go on to keep checking in on what they are doing, you are possibly shape-shifting to their ideas and path. The admiration you have for them is skewed. It looks like despise but it’s obsession.

You admire them so much that you despise them for being unapologetically themselves that you either consciously or unconsciously begin to take lessons. You may not realize it, but others may be able to pinpoint the similarities between you and those you despise.


The next is competitiveness;
Competitiveness is the step-sister to admiration. It is the idea that you can be or exceed another’s ability that you make it into a plot to prove a point. It is premised on the mindset to knock a car out of the road rather than get to your destination.

Usually, the destination of a competitive person is simply beside, behind, or in front of the competition. They are fine just proving a point to themselves and in some cases, to others.

Competitiveness is most often borne out of defeat and pain such that the focus of the competitive becomes to outperform what looks like the competition. Whereas the competition is totally oblivious of the competitive. Hence, the competitive unconsciously begins to shape-shift into the competition because his lack of destination foresight would have him borrowing the competition’s destination and ideals.

When a person looks to another and feels or thinks they are better in any way, older, or more deserving because they are strengthened by the embodiment of another’s essence, it quickly becomes a curse. They would watch them closely like it’s a full-time job, try to copy everything they do in a bid to get ahead of them forgetting that what they do is only a fragment of what gets them ahead.

You see, competitive people may start with an idea or a type of vision but soon lose the ability to crystallize and consolidate that idea and iteration of vision because of their focus.

The danger of this is, anything that takes your competition out of the path you are trailing them on would sweep you out of the field. A lost game. That’s because you cannot beat the game owner when he is playing actively.

Competitiveness robs you off the ability to think for yourself. Instead, you have to think as and through your competition thus helping them advance their agenda. Now, because of the pride associated with competitiveness, it’s easy to think your thoughts are yours but no, they are not. You are only a pawn to enthrone your competition.

You see, if you were that kid who grew up with high expectations from parents or you were constantly compared to others, you are likely competitive and you would currently only operate in potential when you are trying to knock someone out or feel superior. This causes you to shape-shift thus, murdering your ability to be fully authentic, meaningful & purposeful.

Before I delve into the next, the idea of this essay is to help you see where you are and what could be your driver as well as the drivers that exist and how to pay attention so you ride above it. Put yourself under the light to uncover the kind of shape-shifter you could be as well as how you can be sovereign so you stand in your personal power, difference, meaning, and authenticity.


The next is confusion;
You see, when you have a desire for greatness or pressure to show off potential but with shadows of confusion, yup! Shape - Shifting happens.

You become more interested in “becoming” than the object of what you should become hence your confusion becomes like a badge of honor and a cloak for wisdom where potential guides but without purpose. So, you shape-shift into what looks like where you want to go rather than architecting that destination.

The tricky thing about those who are confused but full of potential is the arrogance to accept confusion and chart clarity. Hence, like that red car - it becomes easier to assume clarity by following who they think is headed in their direction than to accept confusion and chart clarity.

Clarity is not necessarily about needing something but acceptance because it refers to the unclouded perception of truth. Hence, a confused person is one with a clouded perception of truth. That is, there is an illusion of knowledge, there is truth but it is clouded. You only see what you want to see and not what is.

A confused person may be unaware of their confusion and only momentarily come into an awareness of confusion when the image of their shape-shift changes direction yet again. If the person you are following takes a different path, it alters your mind in that moment and brings back the shadows of confusion you had thought you laid to rest.

Going back to the story of the red car, the driver in the red car began to feel confused when the path the dark grey car was taking began to have too many turns and twists, and realized that he was oblivious to where he was going. If you have ever done this before as a driver, you’d understand this more keenly and probably laugh out loud because…de javu..

Rather than piloting in the waters of confusion and guided by an object of admiration who exudes profound clarity, accept your reality of confusion and decide on the path most authentic to you and what you’ve been made for. Do not skip the process.

Then finally is, Inadequacy;
When an individual feels inadequate, it prompts them to hide who they really are for fear of judgment and rejection. It creates a problematic desire to fit in, to join the pack, and to express what exists which quickly becomes a mask altering the genuine expression of their truth.

The feeling of inadequacy births the inability to trust your self or believe enough in your path because in your mind, something is broken with you and you lack the capacity to chart a course on your own. This causes you to change who you are because who you are has become insufficient and dented. You’d rather be, who you are not. That’s shape-shifting.

Ever been in a room where you needed to conform to the philosophies boldly communicated when you had an alternate one just because you feared being wrong or insufficient? That’s an example of shape-shifting.

Shape-shifting is simply the idea that you change who you are to represent who you are not or what is largely expressed. It’s a curse, an ailment, and a defect.

It is essential for your humanness to represent boldly yourself to the highest degree without compromising on your difference. This speaks to the ownership of your thoughts, ideas, and ideals as a tool for embodying your essence. It is the freedom to stand in your reality, embrace it, and decide to represent who you are even though it’s uncommon.

Be a Lion or Be a Baboon. Don’t be a lion and seek to shape-shift into a baboon. Walk your path, trust your self and doubt your doubts. It is more noble to err on the path of authenticity than to pass on the path of pretense.

Going back to my opening story, some are the dark grey car who got conscious of a shape-shifter and recorded it as harm such that he changed navigation in a bid to get the red car to stay clear but ended up heading to the wrong destination.

It’s easy to lay fault on the red car because in reality, what do you do when threatened by what seems like harm?

In genius-level expression, you have to own your shape irrespective of those shifting into you such that you do not slow down or end up in an altogether new destination.

You see, this is usually formed based on a corrupted mindset of being one-of-one. Being one of one doesn’t make you susceptible to shapeshifters. It makes you THE SHAPE.

Essentially, it is intelligent to steal like an artist. However, even the artist who steals is aware of the image he seeks to paint. Hence, steal like an artist but know the image you’d be painting. Be aware of your shape and seek to be the best version of the shape you are not the shape you admire.


Be Genius,
Faith Aziegbemi

Find out more about me and my work at www.faithaziegbemi.com